Love crappy movies but are too ashamed to admit it? Are you a big Rob Schneider fan but you're tired of being burned? Not sure if you want to waste your money on the same old movie? That's why you have Joe.
Joe Loves Crappy Movies is by Joseph Dunn. Joe willingly goes to see the very worst that Hollywood has to offer. Whenever a crappy movie comes out Joe will be there to see it, make fun of it, and actually review it. Nothing is safe, and nothing is sacred. From the big budget action disasters to the low brow fart based comedies, to anything starring Martin Lawrence? Joe will tear it apart.
With each entry you'll get not only a comic poking fun at the movie, but also a detailed review. Joe's not educated in film or cinematography or acting, he's just a guy that draws comics and likes movies. So if you're looking for the everyman perspective and a little joke in comic form... you're in the right place.
Captain Will Smith America
Forget all the Batman 3 casting rumors that actually make sense, I want to hear more about comic book casting that never should and never will happen. Stuff like the little rumor announced on MTV by Mirical of St. Anna actor Derek Luke who said, “I heard they offered Will Smith ‘Captain America,’” adding that the intriguing casting rumor “just shows you how times have changed.”
By now you’ve probably already heard this rumor and probably saw it killed courtesy of Aint it Cool less than 24-hours later, but that didn’t make the brief time in between any less of a bizarre speculative catastrophe.
My first reaction to the news was that there was no way it would actually happen, but that if there were any truth to the info at all, it wouldn’t be SO crazy. I mean it’s not like Will Smith isn’t a big deal. He’s arguably the biggest action hero on the planet right now and certainly one of the most powerful brand names in the business. You need someone like that for Cap. He’s kind of a big deal too, at least to comic book fans, and you need a performer that can be a hero, an everyman and still make wings on the side of his head look natural (like they’re actually going to go with the wings…) Smith is the kind of figure that could draw attention to the project and get the masses to appreciate Cap as the iconic super soldier the average comic book fan has come to view him as.
While the rumor is complete rubbish, it was good for one thing – it started up the casting speculation again, which is just as fruitless but still kind of fun. Oh admit it, you love it too. Remember when DiCaprio was supposed to be Iron Man? Can you imagine in a couple years when we’ll be saying “remember when DiCaprio was supposed to be in Akira!?”. Now wrap your head around this – Can you picture DiCaprio in Captain America?
Okay, I’m getting off track. My point with the speculation was that it’s a good time Everyone over on the board is having a blast picking their favorites for the part. My pick right now is Chris Pine. I’ve seen enough of him to know that he can act (even in bad movies) and if he’s as good in Star Trek as some people are saying he is, then it would be the perfect buzz casting to draw attention to the project.
Now all they have to do is release it on Big Willy Weekend and everything will be fine.
As some of you know I decided to sell off some original art earlier this week, and I did so with a lot of hesitation. I really was not sure what to expect. Things went very well I’m happy to report. The 5 pieces I put up sold within a few hours and I’ve had a slew of people contacting me since about specific strips. It was a pleasant surprise to see how eager and excited you guys were at the prospect of some Joe Dunn originals.
I don’t want to take advantage of that though, I’m not going to post a dozen strips per day expecting them to get snatched up, and then just get all pissy when they don’t. I much prefer the “I can’t believe people are actually interested” approach, which makes me sound really pessimistic. I’m going for “humble” but you can see how that would get all mixed up.
So instead of posting a bunch of new pieces I’m going to let them drip out slowly. 2 or 3 here or there, no big deal, but if there’s a strip out there you’re just dying to add to your original art collection, don’t be shy. Shoot me an e-mail
One thing I did hear a lot was that the pieces I put up sold too fast. Some people were complaining they didn’t get a chance and more than a few people were suggesting I use eBay so that people would have time to put in their bid. It made sense and I didn’t want to write it off without giving it a shot, so now that the first pieces are packed up tight and on their way to their new homes I’m testing out the eBay method. Two JLCM related pieces of original art are now up for bid! You’ve got three days to make sure you get them! Here’s what’s on the block!!
Picard + Hen = HENGAGE! - First up, a JLCM original piece featuring a frequenter of backgrounds – Jean Luc Picard!! And he’s holding a hen. If you buy this and you have to then explain to your friends why you have a picture of Jean Luc Picard holding a hen hanging in your bathroom, the answer can be found in the comic I did for Disturbia. However, I invite you to make up your own reasons because that sounds more fun. And place your bid now! Archival ink and pencil on 9x12" charcoal paper. Will ship Priority mail through the US Post Office.
Click on this link or the image above to go to the eBay page. But also check out this larger preview image.
JLCM #240 -300 - Ok, the whole “This is Sparta” thing is seriously played out now, but when I did this strip for the movie’s release in March of ‘07 readers really responded to it. I still have people coming up to me at conventions or sending me the occasional e-mail saying, “This is Soda!” It’s one of those things that really brightens my day even though the joke is a little tired. This is a JLCM classic and you can own it now! Archival ink on 9.25x8.5" bristol board. Will ship Priority mail through the US Post Office.
Click on this link or the image above to go to the eBay page. But also check out this larger preview image.
These are two pieces I’m proud of and I’m happy to share with you guys, and there should be more to come soon. I had a couple inquiries about Coffee Achievers and Turtle vs. Bunny artwork and that will turn up eventually. I’m just taking it nice and slow for now. Annnnd that’s all there is for that.
We’ve got a big weekend of movies coming this week but as I was saying in the Baby Mama review, I’m not sure there’s that much to be excited about. Number one on my list has got to be Burn After Reading. It seems to be a weekend full of great talent in potentially lame movies but Reading looks like the most fun of the bunch, and I could really use a good time at the movies. Not a “good time” like in a creepy Alanis way. I just want to laugh. Get your mind out of the gutter. …Oh and thanks for reading!
Joe – The creator of the strip who has embraced giving crappy movies the chance they deserve. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - The Introduction
Yeo – Yeo is Joe’s wife and often the voice of reason in the strip. Having her act rational allows the rest of the cast to embrace being in a comic strip which primarily involves randomly punching people, interacting with fictional characters and talking about boobs. Yeo is smart, beautiful and way too good for Joe. Don’t tip her off.
First Appearance - Fever Pitch
Irv – Joe’s movie-going sidekick who’s always down for watching Jason Statham crescent moon kick some thug through a plate glass window and getting some drinks before after and during a Vin Diesel movie. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - Ong-Bak: The Thai Warrior
Agent 337 George Jones – A government Agent that took over for Joe after he was bad-mouthing President Bush in the V for Vendetta strip. George ran the show for over a month bring a much needed sense of patriotism and justice to both the strips and reviews. He eventually got too attached to his work, empathizing with Joe’s plight to give crappy movies a fair shake. In a way he came to love crappy movies as well and was pushed out of the position. He spiraled out of control and ended up in prison. His adventures will be told in the limited series JLCM Presents: 337 Locked Up which is set to début Christmas of 09.
First Appearance - V for Vendetta
Other Notable Appearances: Stay Alive, Ice age 2, Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector, Slither, Here Comes Guest week, Let’s Go To Prison
Leonidas – The former king of Sparta who has traveled into the future and is having trouble coping with the modern times. Yelling loudly and kicking people into giant holes doesn’t really work the same way it did in the olden days. As time as gone by he’s adjusted but it’s a safe bet that he’s always one bad message away from throwing a spear through someone.
First Appearance - 300
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Strip# 300, The Golden Compass, Rambo, Untraceable, The Ladies of Max Paybe
Palpatine – Former Senator, Emperor of the Galactic Empire, Sith Lord... He shows up in the Joe Loves Crappy movies galaxy on occasion to let people know that they’re being stupid. No one’s really sure how he shows up in this universe but chances are it breaks all kinds of copywrite laws.
First Appearance - Episode III: The Dark Side
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Night Watch, Saw 3, Are We Done Yet
Slow Billy – Billy is a sweet kid but he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed. If you’re watching him for the day be prepared to explain to him the plot of the movie or how popcorn works or, not so much where babies come from, but what babies are. He’s a complete moron.
First Appearance - Four Brothers
Other Notable Appearances: The Chronicles of Narnia, The Da Vinci Code, Vantage Point, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Kyle the Movie Snob – Be careful what fun facts about movies you tell your friends at a friendly gathering or in line for the latest blockbuster, because if you’re even slightly wrong, Kyle will be more than happy to let you know. He usually gets what’s coming to him though. Poor guy has cracked three ribs since joining the JLCM cast.
First Appearance - Ultraviolet
Other Notable Appearances: 16 Blocks, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End, Transformers, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Jean-Luc Picard – Another lawsuit waiting to happen is Jean Luc Picard who, towards the end of the strip’s first year, became the go-to background character. If there was ever a seat to fill or a random person to place wandering around in the background, nine times out of ten it was Picard. While Picard has crossed paths with Irv he and Joe have never met. Perhaps they will some day but for now just can an eye on the background.
First Appearance - The Producers
Other Notable Appearances: I’m not telling you, that’s no fun. It’ like Where’s Waldo – go find him!
Ice Cream Sandwich – Delicious and… deadly? Usually when you see someone eating an Ice Cream sandwich, someone else is experiencing a substantial amount of pain. Still, how nice is an ice cream sandwich on a hot summer day?
First Appearance - Saw IV
Other Notable Appearances: Bee Movie, Run Fatboy Run, Saw V
