Released: 12/23/05

Viewed: 7:00pm 12/08/05

Starring: Jim Carrey, Tea Leoni, Alec Baldwin

Directed by: Dean Parisot

Everyone's all worked up over the King Kong remake. How it's a sign that there's nothing left to write when we're remaking the classics of cinema. But why get so bothered by a remake that's brilliant, when you have talented people remaking crappy movies and not improving on them at all. That's something to get upset about.

When Jim Carrey and Judd Apatow, are the names attached to your film you expect a certain level of funny. These are inherently funny people, but instead of the magic chemistry you'd expect, it feels like a lot of people phoning it in and collecting paychecks.

I don't mean to assume, I respect everyone involved, and each have proven themselves to me 1,000 time over, but something was definitely off here. A piece of the puzzle is missing. It's as if there wasn't a full script, or too much was expected of Jim (Dick) and Tea (Jane) to fill the gaps with "Ka-razy" improvised comedy gold. And then they didn't, or it was edited together poorly, or a third option. I don't know, I don't want to point fingers, but at the end of the day we've got a really one-dimensional movie with a simple plot, and a loosely thought out resolution. Which all would be fine if we were distracted by it being hysterically funny. No such luck.

There are funny moments, mostly ruined by the commercials and trailers, but none are so funny that you loose control. At only one point in the movie did I loose control of my laugh box and hold my side in a giggle fit. Without ruining it, it involves Dick hiding in the bank office. Didn't see it coming. Laughed for at least 3 minutes and mentioned it 5times after the movie.

But from Jim Carrey that's nothing. I can remember watching Ace Ventura as a lad, for the 50th time and still laughing that hard at least 2 dozen times during the movie. Man, when he punches that Eagles mascot?. Where was I? Yes, the funny. It's just not enough.

Even from the screenwriter Apatow who has become a master of combining the heart warming and the dangerously funny. With moves like Anchorman, The 40 year old Virgin, and some of the best TV of the last decade with Freaks and Geeks and undeclared, I expected more of the same. A real story that's really funny. But this script plays out more like a rough outline. It's not like there's any glaring plot holes or confusing moments, but there's also no emotion behind it.

It makes me think that Apatow's instincts for comedy as a director are much stronger than his comedic instincts as a writer. Again I could be misreading this. It could be the editor's fault. Who knows? It's just not that funny.

The story itself is basic. Family plays it safe, plays by the rules, and when it bites them in the ass, they turn to crime. Sounds like a great idea for a movie huh? Unfortunately, it needs to be fleshed out a little. Dick and Jane eventually target the responsible parties to claim back their money, and the money of all the former employees that were blind-sided by the companies crumbling. It ends up being a pretty lackluster finale as they confront the president of the company Alec Baldwin in the bank. They think they've tricked him, but he's tricked them, but wait? Who cares!?

What would have been awesome is if there were 3 or 4 business heads, and they took them out one by one, working they're way up to the big man. If anything it just creates more opportunity for comedy.

I liked Tea Leoni in this movie. She's sexy and funny, but is certainly taking a second chair to Carrey here. They do have great chemistry, but it seems like she's just set up for his funny moments, which is a waste, because she's funny in her own right.

I love Alec Baldwin, his timing and presence are worth the hefty price tag, but whoever let him do the southern accent should be shot. He's got so much power in his voice. Think about Elizabethtown and The Royal Tenenebaums. I could of listened to him talk all day. But here? I just couldn't get used to it. I wanted nothing to do with it.

It's as if some of the greatest comedians of their crafts were collected together to make the big Christmas monster comedy hit, and instead they all choked. People will still see this, and they'll laugh because they're supposed to. I did. I laughed hoping it would be funnier. Only after thinking about it did I realize how it wasn't very funny at all. So please, go see it, and enjoy it. But do yourself a favor and don't think about it afterwards.

4 out of 10: The more I think about it the more it upsets me. Just a wasted opportunity from real talent. I mean if this was Owen Wilson I would say he was just having an off movie, but Carrey hasn't missed this bad in a long time.

DVD worthy?: No. I feel like I want it to be better so I'm sure I'll rent it with some sort of hop it will be awesome. But I've made that mistake before.

If you liked this movie check out: Dumb and Dumber

This movie made me yearn for the truly hysterically absurd Jim Carrey. Pretty much any of his really out there comedies. Dumb and Dumber was so pure in it's craziness. There have been many pretenders since, but that movie is great.

In the movie Dick and Jane are strapped for cash, yet they buy disguises to rob these places; elaborate disguises that couldn't have been cheap. Is it wrong that I'm over analyzing it to that point? The devil's advocate in me says that they got enough money but were hooked on the thrill of the robbery, but that creates either major conflicts with the ending of the movie, or perhaps sets up a sequel. Either way, I say "Lame". Anyway, the incentive image for today has me in my bank robbing gear. It's not very funny, but ? well. I explain it. Enjoy.