Released: 10/28/05

Viewed: 1:45pm 10/30/05

Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Val Kilmer, Michelle Monaghan

Directed by: Shane Black

I'm so sick about the kiss. Any promotion I saw for this movie started and ended with the kiss. I know what Val Kilmer ate for lunch the day they filmed the kiss. There's no reason I should know that! It's a kiss. It's not even a good kiss. The sad thing is, if it hadn't been so heavily publicized then it might have been a genuinely funny moment. Instead? lame. It became this thing. Something I waited to come and pass, just so I could enjoy the rest of the movie. And the media, even the stars, latched on to this 30-second scene as the draw for the entire movie, which of course resulted in it getting it's ass kicked by an animated chicken.

The movie deserves better then that. All the reviews you read saying, "this is the smart man's action comedy" are dead on. It's fast, funny, and wickedly clever to the point where you too would make out with Robert Downey Jr. just to have your name attached to this movie.

The dialogue, like it's being read right out of a 40's crime novel, is classic in tone, yet modernized so it's not out of place. I'm not sure if it was because of the style, but everything anyone said sounded like a great, never before realized idea. And you wonder how someone could come up with so many original thoughts.

I believe that every person has one supreme understanding or turn of phrase that is his or her own. One grand epiphany that if correctly explained or presented will make every other person in the room wish they'd thought of it first. It's as if Shane Black brought together 2 dozen brilliant people and forced them at gunpoint to reveal theirs. Every other scene in this movie, there was a great comedic moment, or a great quotable line. That's what really makes a movie like this better than the rest.

But can "cool" carry a movie? Not always, but Val Kilmer as a gay Hollywood cop, and Downey jr. as a man on the run, have such great chemistry (gay kissing jokes aside) that it really saves the movie. Not that it would have fallen apart with less capable stars, but these are obviously guys that know what they're doing, and that are having a good time. It makes it a hell of a lot more fun to watch.

Pacing is a huge thing with me. A slow movie can fall apart and bore me to tears, but Kiss Kiss Bang Bang was able to keep things moving with narration. I know, the last time narration saved a movie Morgan Freeman was marching some penguins to funky town, but the use of it here is truly brilliant. Well shot, well timed, funny in its 4th wall breaking, but without being corny. If there are any problems with it, it's that theirs not enough.

That seriously held together a so-so plot. It wasn't too complex or too dumb downed, I mean? someone loses a finger. Twice. That's pretty cool, and about as complex as most people are willing to get, but I feel like there could have been more. The big reveal isn't such a great surprise. I suppose I'm spoiled but I want to be a little shocked at the end. They do right to play with us a little as they squeak out the happy ending poking fun at themselves you can't help but smile through your subtle disappointment.

Man on man make out sessions not withstanding, this is really the great buddy comedy aimed at the smarter adults that a lot of people have been waiting for. Ample amounts of action without being obsessive, plenty of laughs, beautiful women, and? well, what else are you looking for? Kind of a hard push at the very end for a sequel, but I'd love to see one. Unfortunately, America does not. Rent it a lot in the spring, I guess.

7 out of 10. It was a nice night out with my lady without the guilt over laughing a little to hard at some lame fart joke. There's a certain level of pride when as an adult you're able to watch a movie for adults and enjoy it. That came out like we watched a porno didn't it?

DVD worthy?: Definitely maybe. The movies interesting enough that I would love to hear a good audio commentary from the writer and director, as well as Robert and Val. They seemed like they were having a lot of fun and beyond how obviously lame their comments would be in the kissing scene, I'm sure there would be tons of insight and good times throughout the rest.

Trailer Hitch: Syriana

Ok, this one looks interesting. I'm a little worried about it's subject matter, in that it seems very specific to a moment in time. This can be a huge turn off to some people. A lot of people aren't ready to face the problems our world is facing so when a movie like Syriana comes up, and it's talking about war, and oil, and torture?. Some people just aren't ready to deal with it.

My hope is that the talent behind it will draw people to the theater. Truthfully Clooney is enough for me. Even his bad movies are still worth watching at least once. Toss in the finest American character actor Jeffery Write, and there's no reason not to go. It may be really heavy, but do you want to forget your troubles, or understand them better?

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