Love crappy movies but are too ashamed to admit it? Are you a big Rob Schneider fan but you're tired of being burned? Not sure if you want to waste your money on the same old movie? That's why you have Joe.
Joe Loves Crappy Movies is by Joseph Dunn. Joe willingly goes to see the very worst that Hollywood has to offer. Whenever a crappy movie comes out Joe will be there to see it, make fun of it, and actually review it. Nothing is safe, and nothing is sacred. From the big budget action disasters to the low brow fart based comedies, to anything starring Martin Lawrence? Joe will tear it apart.
With each entry you'll get not only a comic poking fun at the movie, but also a detailed review. Joe's not educated in film or cinematography or acting, he's just a guy that draws comics and likes movies. So if you're looking for the everyman perspective and a little joke in comic form... you're in the right place.
The Muppets
Starring: Amy Adams, Jason Segel, Chris Cooper, Rashida Jones, Steve Whitmire, Eric Jacobson, Dave Goelz and Jack Black
Directed by: James Bobin
The Muppets on Facebook
I'm as pleased as anyone at the return of The Muppets. I'm doubly pleased at their success because it means there will be more Muppet goodness in the years to come. If history tells us anything there will be some over saturation, a dip in quality and banishment to the felt corner of the Disney vault until a new generation is deemed worthy of making a rainbow connection. But let's not dwell on the negative... The Muppets are back, healthy and as hilarious as ever.
I grew up less on The Muppet Show and more on reruns of the original movie and the Muppet Babies cartoon, something that goes completely against the fundamental wizardry of puppetry that was the bedrock of the characters, but still captured the imagination with the same charm and style. That sentiment is paramount to me in revisiting the Muppets in any format and I think it is part of what makes this latest offering such a success. Even as it was accused of being too crude or out of touch with what the Muppets used to be, I knew that as long as the sentiment was there it would be a good time at the movies. Some differences are to be expected. I can deal with Fozzie wearing shoes that fart or realer than real romance drama between the pig and the frog… hell they could even have recast Dave Grohl as Animal, as long as it was sweet, funny and inspirational then I was going to be on board.
I was never really worried though. Not only do I love the Muppets but I have a tremendous amount of faith in Jason Segal who has been spearheading this reboot ever since he made felt vampires sing in the amazing Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Segal to me is the real deal. He understands funny and he's able to bring a passion project to life. He's a rare talent that follows through.
He brings that passion to The Muppets and helps deliver this wonderful adventure about the old gang getting back together to put on a show to save the studio. The first 3rd of the movie where we follow a new Muppet named Walter as he finds out about the studio's hard luck and looks to turn things around by gathering together the gang is inspired Muppet genius. The 4th wall is shattered; it's delightfully quirky and (forgive me hipster gods) “a-dorkable". In the first half hour I roared at the reveals of a gardener spraying a window with a hose or the sudden arrival of a choir bus not to mention Rowlf agreeing to come back. It's great. Pitch perfect Muppets.
The magic doesn't last forever though. With the introduction of Piggy comes a lot of resistance to the flow of the film. She's the first character to not want to save the theater and it makes you realize that everyone has needed some convincing. Throughout the movie the Muppets are constantly trying to convince each other that this plan to save the theater is the right thing to do. They're trying to convince each other even when they all agree. You could get away with calling this movie The Great Muppet Pep Talk. It's a little grueling.
The film's low point is a six-minute period where Amy Adams has a “me party" and Chris Cooper raps. Old white rapping is not fun anymore. No matter how good the song is in retrospect (it actually plays pretty well on CD) or how suitable it is for the villainous oil baron character, his scene and the story overall. Ultimately it's a jarring chunk of the film that will have you questioning it instead of enjoying it. This is hard to bounce back from.
In general the Muppets is very music heavy. To a fault maybe. The majority of the songs (from Flight of the Concords' Brett Mckenzie who has since won the Oscar for “Man or Muppet") are fantastic but even good songs can slow a films progression. In the middle of the film I wanted to see the problems get resolved not watch someone sing about how they're still not resolved.
In the true spirit of the original films the parade of celebrity cameos ranges from random to inspired. Jack Black as the host/hostage of the big show was mined for some well-earned laughs. When leaving the theater I immediately tweeted, "If The Muppets had been sold to me as 'Rashida Jones, wears a power suit and yells at felt' - I would have been on board from day one." Both of them really shine in their supporting parts while at the same time people like Feist and Mickey Rooney pop up and disappear before your memory can find their name.
I had an interesting experience with the puppetry of this film in that I didn't really notice it. It's brilliant of course. In watching the film back on DVD you can see all the hard work and creativity that went towards bringing these guys to life. But we totally take it for granted. We know these characters. They've been putting on shows for us our entire lives. To me I've already accepted them as “real". I'm not looking for the puppeteer cranking Kermit's arm I'm just watching Kermit the Frog wave at the crowd. That's kind of an amazing achievement if you think about it. Jim Henson has given us a unique gift in these characters. For that reason I will always welcome them back with open arms.
The Muppets is not perfect but I'm okay with that. What kind of rag tag band of misfits can boast perfection? But the spirit and heart are there in abundance. As is the humor that brought me back from the deepest of lulls, which was never really all that deep.
It's so comforting to have these guys back. To look forward to more. To look forward to sharing them with my own children and my nieces and nephews. It's a fun world when the Muppets are in it.
Yeah, you gotta get this. In terms of the other films it probably ranks just bellow the original and The Muppets Take Manhattan but not very far bellow. It's pure joy. Quit stalling. Head on over to Amazon.
I would like to, if I could, discuss some spoilers about the film. So if you've not yet seen it please go away. Respectfully. Thank you for stopping by though.
The Muppets seemed to pride itself on self-referential storytelling. Humor, even plot, are based on the awareness of “The Muppets" as a franchise. It shocks me then that they would wrap up this film with no loose ends. So much so that they would negate the entire point of the film. Massive spoilers ahead - beware. The film ends with The Muppets failing at their task of saving the theater and retaining ownership of the Muppet brand with the specific idea that - that stuff doesn't matter as long as we have each other. What's in a name...? A sentiment so sweet that they sing a song about it.
3 minutes later… It's overturned - not because the villain has a change of heart but because he suffers a massive head injury at the hands of the Muppets. Would it not be enough that the injury would surly stop him from rapping ever again? Must it also clean up all our messes?
I propose that a sequel in which they rebuild anew, and reclaim the Muppet brand would have been a lot of fun, a logical next step...
I suppose it's always possible Chris Cooper could get hit with another heavy object and change his mind again.
Joe – The creator of the strip who has embraced giving crappy movies the chance they deserve. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - The Introduction
Yeo – Yeo is Joe’s wife and often the voice of reason in the strip. Having her act rational allows the rest of the cast to embrace being in a comic strip which primarily involves randomly punching people, interacting with fictional characters and talking about boobs. Yeo is smart, beautiful and way too good for Joe. Don’t tip her off.
First Appearance - Fever Pitch
Irv – Joe’s movie-going sidekick who’s always down for watching Jason Statham crescent moon kick some thug through a plate glass window and getting some drinks before after and during a Vin Diesel movie. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - Ong-Bak: The Thai Warrior
Agent 337 George Jones – A government Agent that took over for Joe after he was bad-mouthing President Bush in the V for Vendetta strip. George ran the show for over a month bring a much needed sense of patriotism and justice to both the strips and reviews. He eventually got too attached to his work, empathizing with Joe’s plight to give crappy movies a fair shake. In a way he came to love crappy movies as well and was pushed out of the position. He spiraled out of control and ended up in prison. His adventures will be told in the limited series JLCM Presents: 337 Locked Up which is set to début Christmas of 09.
First Appearance - V for Vendetta
Other Notable Appearances: Stay Alive, Ice age 2, Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector, Slither, Here Comes Guest week, Let’s Go To Prison
Leonidas – The former king of Sparta who has traveled into the future and is having trouble coping with the modern times. Yelling loudly and kicking people into giant holes doesn’t really work the same way it did in the olden days. As time as gone by he’s adjusted but it’s a safe bet that he’s always one bad message away from throwing a spear through someone.
First Appearance - 300
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Strip# 300, The Golden Compass, Rambo, Untraceable, The Ladies of Max Paybe
Palpatine – Former Senator, Emperor of the Galactic Empire, Sith Lord... He shows up in the Joe Loves Crappy movies galaxy on occasion to let people know that they’re being stupid. No one’s really sure how he shows up in this universe but chances are it breaks all kinds of copywrite laws.
First Appearance - Episode III: The Dark Side
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Night Watch, Saw 3, Are We Done Yet
Slow Billy – Billy is a sweet kid but he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed. If you’re watching him for the day be prepared to explain to him the plot of the movie or how popcorn works or, not so much where babies come from, but what babies are. He’s a complete moron.
First Appearance - Four Brothers
Other Notable Appearances: The Chronicles of Narnia, The Da Vinci Code, Vantage Point, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Kyle the Movie Snob – Be careful what fun facts about movies you tell your friends at a friendly gathering or in line for the latest blockbuster, because if you’re even slightly wrong, Kyle will be more than happy to let you know. He usually gets what’s coming to him though. Poor guy has cracked three ribs since joining the JLCM cast.
First Appearance - Ultraviolet
Other Notable Appearances: 16 Blocks, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End, Transformers, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Jean-Luc Picard – Another lawsuit waiting to happen is Jean Luc Picard who, towards the end of the strip’s first year, became the go-to background character. If there was ever a seat to fill or a random person to place wandering around in the background, nine times out of ten it was Picard. While Picard has crossed paths with Irv he and Joe have never met. Perhaps they will some day but for now just can an eye on the background.
First Appearance - The Producers
Other Notable Appearances: I’m not telling you, that’s no fun. It’ like Where’s Waldo – go find him!
Ice Cream Sandwich – Delicious and… deadly? Usually when you see someone eating an Ice Cream sandwich, someone else is experiencing a substantial amount of pain. Still, how nice is an ice cream sandwich on a hot summer day?
First Appearance - Saw IV
Other Notable Appearances: Bee Movie, Run Fatboy Run, Saw V