Love crappy movies but are too ashamed to admit it? Are you a big Rob Schneider fan but you're tired of being burned? Not sure if you want to waste your money on the same old movie? That's why you have Joe.
Joe Loves Crappy Movies is by Joseph Dunn. Joe willingly goes to see the very worst that Hollywood has to offer. Whenever a crappy movie comes out Joe will be there to see it, make fun of it, and actually review it. Nothing is safe, and nothing is sacred. From the big budget action disasters to the low brow fart based comedies, to anything starring Martin Lawrence? Joe will tear it apart.
With each entry you'll get not only a comic poking fun at the movie, but also a detailed review. Joe's not educated in film or cinematography or acting, he's just a guy that draws comics and likes movies. So if you're looking for the everyman perspective and a little joke in comic form... you're in the right place.
Four Christmases
Starring: Vince Vaughn, Reese Witherspoon, Robert Duvall, Sissy Spacek, Jon Voight, Jon Favreau, Mary Steenburgen, Dwight Yoakam, Tim McGraw, Kristin Chenoweth
Directed by: Seth Gordon
Warner Brothers Pictures
The Official Site of Four Christmases
Discuss Four Christmases on the boards!
When I first saw commercials for the Vince Vaughn Reese Witherspoon holiday comedy Four Christmases, about a selfish couple forced to visit each of their parents for four different Christmases celebrations, all I could think was, “Didn’t Vince Vaughn just do this?” As vastly different as Four Christmases and last year’s Fred Claus are thematically, back-to-back Christmas films always comes off as a cry for help. It’s almost as if Vince Vaughn is stuck in a very special Christmas episode of The Twilight Zone where he’s forced to fast talk his way through one holiday themed adventure after another.
Was Fred Claus so good that he had to return to the ever giving branch of the family friendly Christmas Tree? I saw Fred Claus. It wasn’t that good. Not so good that Vince Vaughn should willingly succumb to being the next big screen Tim Allen.
As Four Christmases began I realized it was something else all together. It was fast and smart and… FUN! This wasn’t a return to something safe, a sure-fired crowd pleaser and box office success that would ensure Vaughn another 20 minutes in the spotlight. This was his mulligan! His Incredible Hulk! His Punisher War Zone! His Christmas movie do-over to redeem himself and all the poor folks that fell for the great idea but clumsy execution of Fred Claus.
I’m being too hard on Fred Claus, a movie that embraced the family friendly predictability that we’ve come to associate with holiday films like this. But if leaning the elbow in a little on Fred Claus will help illustrate the point of how impressed I was with the first 15 minutes of Four Christmases, then so be it.
Even though Kate and Brad (Reese and Vince) are going out of their way to avoid their families during the holidays, their easy going connection and genuine chemistry were a welcoming invitation to plot and scheme with them a little. You’ll love the characters and their interaction with one another enough to look past a little selfishness around the holidays.
When their plan to vacation in Fiji gets ruined by a little bad weather they’re forced to make the rounds with the family in the inevitable parade of awkwardness. Screaming children and bickering adults had me gripping my armrest and I twisted in my chair as the good will they’d earned with the film’s sharp opening felt like a distant memory in a completely different movie. I quickly found myself wishing that the fog would lift and we could follow the entertaining duo to Fiji. We probably wouldn’t learn any kind of special message about the holidays but we’d at least get to see some exotic fish and a steel drum or something. Everyone loves a steel drum.
What my face must have looked like when the realization hit that this was just the first of four houses. That we would find nothing but the same with each stop. And we did. Each parent had a unique holiday trap that will make you relive bad memories of your own family get togethers or be very very grateful your parents were normal and a little bit boring. Still, through the unpleasantness, Four Christmases was earning some strong and steady laughs..
Through visiting their families the couple begins to learn things about each other that they’d never known. Kate realizes she has a biological clock and the once “just happy to be together” couple encounter some real challenges to their relationship for the first time.
This moral of Four Christmases might not go down exactly as you’d expect it to. If a holiday movie embraces its message it’ll more than likely be described as safe and sappy. If it avoids the message completely then it’ll be bashed for missing the point of what a movie like this is supposed to be. Four Chrsitmases walks down the middle ignoring sappy and “suppose to”s in favor of something a little more realistic. Kate and Brad don’t necessarily love and appreciate their families anymore than they did before the adventure began, but they end up knowing each other a little better. So that’s something. Some steel drums would’ve been nice though.
Rating: 6.5 out of 10 - Christmases has been getting a decidedly bellow average response from critics but even though it had me squirming and ignored any kind of grand moral message of the season, I had a good time. It’s light and funny and a half way decent way to spend Thanksgiving. It’ll never make it to Christmas though.
Vince and Reese are wonderful together. They bounce off each other brilliantly bringing out the best in each other without stepping on anyone’s toes. Within 5 minutes I was ready to induct Witherspoon into the Frat Pack (is anyone still talking about that?) Another welcome surprise was Jon Voight who plays Kate’s father. I said this earlier in the year in my review of Pride and Glory, but his performance here warrants mentioning it again. It’s easy to just label Voight as the goofy old guy in the National Treasure movies, but a lot of people forget that at one point in time he was an A-list acting threat. The man still has the chops of the best in the game in it’s so great to see him treated with respect in Four Christmases. He’s the one parent that escapes becoming a caricature and it’s a welcome and worthy surprise.
If it runs the same schedule as Fred Claus, you’re going to have to wait a year before it’s even available and any charm that was with me after leaving the theater will more than likely be gone by then. I’d like to see it again though if only to see if it has the chance of being a holiday classic. There are films like It’s a Wonderful Life, Elf and Love Actually that I like to watch around the holidays every single year. I’m always looking for new ones to add to the list and a couple of whip smart lines from Vince Vaughn in a film that doesn’t require him to dress up in a costume and ham it up with little people (scratch that) might do the trick.
The Ugly Truth - The Ugly Truth answers the question of what happens when a male chauvinistic pig is confronted with a strong powerful woman. The trailer takes a quick ugly turn when the prude gets the pig to teacher her how to find Mr. Right and - surprise surprise – he does it by turning her into a slut.
It’s a terrible plot but even from the short trailer it’s not as plain as I’m making it. To be hoest though it doesn’t seem so bad in the hands of Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler who dropped off a couple of killer romantic comedies earlier this year with 27 Dresses and P.S. I Love You. It’ll be predictable and I’m sure a little painful in parts but great actors are always the best chance for great characters and I trust these two beyond The Ugly Truths less than impressive trailer.
I spent a lot of time trying to figure out which show to use as the marathon. It would have to be a show so terrible that it wouldn’t actually engage you, but so good that you might actually watch some of it. For the longest time in my head it was Chris Angel: Mindfreak. He is a fascinating man. Charles in Charge hit me suddenly out of nowhere and I ran with it, trying to remember my favorite episodes. Oddly enough there weren’t that many moments that leapt out at me. The show was terribly repetitive, but oh so entertaining.
Over the past 6 months or so I’ve been trying to get a better grasp on caricatures. I’ve had a couple of commissions that required me to really push my limited abilities to their breaking point. It’s been fun. I’ve forced myself into a style that at first was very uncomfortable but over time has become exciting! I sat down last night to work on a caricature of Harvey Milk and I was having a blast! It’s important to remember and cherish moments of pure inspiration ad joy. I think that’s what makes artist want to be artists in the first place right?
One of the larger projects I’d worked on was a set of wedding table images for some friends. Below are a couple of examples but you can see the full set of 12 here as well as larger versions of the examples. It was a fun challenge that wasn’t always fun at the time but I’m better off for it I think. Some of the things I learned there are leaking over into my work now within the strip and that’s good. Getting better is important. If you not going forward then you’re standing still. Or something like that. And growth is constant. Looking at these images now I know I would do them differently if I did them again. That’s a good thing. I think… ☺
Yesterday I mentioned isitfunnytoday.com and how JLCM was doing pretty well over there. A quick welcome to all the folks that have been checking out the site the past few days and a thanks to those of you that voted “yes” to JLCM being funny. To anyone that voted no… well you can read the last word balloon of this strip.
The extra bump in traffic from isitfunny.com and reddit.com has been nice. I don’t like to do much self-promotion but it’s always a thrill when you guys go out of your way to spread the word. Big thanks for everyone that’s been involved.
I’ll keep trying to make funny stuff as often as possible. See you tomorrow with something new!
Joe – The creator of the strip who has embraced giving crappy movies the chance they deserve. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - The Introduction
Yeo – Yeo is Joe’s wife and often the voice of reason in the strip. Having her act rational allows the rest of the cast to embrace being in a comic strip which primarily involves randomly punching people, interacting with fictional characters and talking about boobs. Yeo is smart, beautiful and way too good for Joe. Don’t tip her off.
First Appearance - Fever Pitch
Irv – Joe’s movie-going sidekick who’s always down for watching Jason Statham crescent moon kick some thug through a plate glass window and getting some drinks before after and during a Vin Diesel movie. Like the majority of the cast he’s obsessed with boobs.
First Appearance - Ong-Bak: The Thai Warrior
Agent 337 George Jones – A government Agent that took over for Joe after he was bad-mouthing President Bush in the V for Vendetta strip. George ran the show for over a month bring a much needed sense of patriotism and justice to both the strips and reviews. He eventually got too attached to his work, empathizing with Joe’s plight to give crappy movies a fair shake. In a way he came to love crappy movies as well and was pushed out of the position. He spiraled out of control and ended up in prison. His adventures will be told in the limited series JLCM Presents: 337 Locked Up which is set to début Christmas of 09.
First Appearance - V for Vendetta
Other Notable Appearances: Stay Alive, Ice age 2, Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector, Slither, Here Comes Guest week, Let’s Go To Prison
Leonidas – The former king of Sparta who has traveled into the future and is having trouble coping with the modern times. Yelling loudly and kicking people into giant holes doesn’t really work the same way it did in the olden days. As time as gone by he’s adjusted but it’s a safe bet that he’s always one bad message away from throwing a spear through someone.
First Appearance - 300
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Strip# 300, The Golden Compass, Rambo, Untraceable, The Ladies of Max Paybe
Palpatine – Former Senator, Emperor of the Galactic Empire, Sith Lord... He shows up in the Joe Loves Crappy movies galaxy on occasion to let people know that they’re being stupid. No one’s really sure how he shows up in this universe but chances are it breaks all kinds of copywrite laws.
First Appearance - Episode III: The Dark Side
Other Notable Appearances: Four Brothers, Night Watch, Saw 3, Are We Done Yet
Slow Billy – Billy is a sweet kid but he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed. If you’re watching him for the day be prepared to explain to him the plot of the movie or how popcorn works or, not so much where babies come from, but what babies are. He’s a complete moron.
First Appearance - Four Brothers
Other Notable Appearances: The Chronicles of Narnia, The Da Vinci Code, Vantage Point, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Kyle the Movie Snob – Be careful what fun facts about movies you tell your friends at a friendly gathering or in line for the latest blockbuster, because if you’re even slightly wrong, Kyle will be more than happy to let you know. He usually gets what’s coming to him though. Poor guy has cracked three ribs since joining the JLCM cast.
First Appearance - Ultraviolet
Other Notable Appearances: 16 Blocks, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End, Transformers, Journey to the Center of the Earth
Jean-Luc Picard – Another lawsuit waiting to happen is Jean Luc Picard who, towards the end of the strip’s first year, became the go-to background character. If there was ever a seat to fill or a random person to place wandering around in the background, nine times out of ten it was Picard. While Picard has crossed paths with Irv he and Joe have never met. Perhaps they will some day but for now just can an eye on the background.
First Appearance - The Producers
Other Notable Appearances: I’m not telling you, that’s no fun. It’ like Where’s Waldo – go find him!
Ice Cream Sandwich – Delicious and… deadly? Usually when you see someone eating an Ice Cream sandwich, someone else is experiencing a substantial amount of pain. Still, how nice is an ice cream sandwich on a hot summer day?
First Appearance - Saw IV
Other Notable Appearances: Bee Movie, Run Fatboy Run, Saw V