Starring: Brendan Fraser, Josh Hutcherson, Anita Briem, Seth Meyers

Directed by: Eric Brevig

New Line Cinemas

The Official Site of Journey to the Center of the Earth

Discuss Journey to the Center of the Earth on the boards!

So what is Journey to the Center of the Earth about? Not the movie, but the book that it’s based on – what’s that about? Believe it or not I never read the Jules Verne classic. (Another strike against the Collingswood, NJ elementary school program) And believe it or not again, I’m not so curious about how much this latest update, a 3-D extravaganza where three lost souls take a trip into the colourful but dangerous core, borrows from the source and how much is just pulled out of thin air as something that might look cool on the big screen. What I want to know is what the book was really about.

Does Journey to the Center of the Earth have a hidden meaning? Does the core represent man’s hubris? Is Professor Liedenbrock a symbol for Communism? Stuff like that. The kind of stuff wikpedia won’t tell me and I’m probably too dim to figure out reading the book on my own without some 8th grade teacher explaining it to me as I go. So what’s the deal? Any 8th grade teachers (or 8th graders) read JLCM and willing to shed some light on the true meaning of Journey to the Center of the Earth?

Or am I grasping at straws? Is Journey less political propaganda disguised as a rip-roaring good time and more just the good time? The only reason I ask is because this 2008 update isn’t hiding anything. There’s nothing bellow the surface, pardon the pun. The story is about exactly what’s up there on screen. The good news is that what’s up there is a fun little voyage. Not as dazzling as the gimmicky 3-D glasses you’re wearing would have you believe, but enjoyable none the less.

The movie is about a scientist and his nephew (Brendan Fraser and Josh Hutcherson) who begin chasing the incomplete studies of their missing family member. With a hired guide (Anita Briem) they stumble into a cavern that drops them to the center of the earth, which, as it turns out is a lot different than you would have expected.

As far-fetched as some of their encounters bellow the surface are, or the fact that they’re that far bellow the surface at all, I appreciated that the filmmakers tried to explain everything with science. Even in the face of a gorgeous and destructive T-rex on a clear-as-day green-screened set, they still took the time to explain what was going on and why. At the very least they explained it well enough for the 13-year-old target audience to go along with. I’m sure there were a few scientists in the crowd doing some heavy eye rolling but I feel sorry for them. You’d like to think that stories like this inspired them once upon a time. Why should it be different now just because what these characters are doing is impossible? …Okay, yeah. That doesn’t make sense.

As they plummeted into the Earth I thought to myself, “Wow I really expected it to be a bigger group of people. This is great – we’ll be able to focus on these characters and not get distracted!� After the 3rd or 4th obstacle at the core though I found myself wishing that the group included an evil scientist to fight instead of the oddities of the center of the earth. Someone that wanted to use the wonders of the core to his own nefarious devices! Every team of lost adventures needs a Dr. Smith, right? (You believe me now when I tell you I haven’t read the book?) Well, it might not be the best of ideas but in my defence, they really didn’t explore these three characters to their fullest. I’m tempted to say it was a generous amount for a children’s movie but that excuse will only work so many times in this review.

It’s likely though that even the sharpest kids won’t mind a few scientific inaccuracies in the face of the 3-D experience. The effects range from impressive to annoying, but I liked that the filmmakers neither exploited nor neglected the technology when it’s used. There’s definitely down time where you forget there are effects at all, but there’s definitely the occasional spit take and deadly leaping monster that will jolt your head back and remind you to be on guard. Try to take it all in stride. This isn’t the pinnacle of 3D technology, but it’s certainly serviceable in this family film.

And that’s what it comes down to. You could pick apart every aspect of Journey because there are erroneous exaggerations throughout, but you’d only find yourself nit-picking a kid’s movie. It’s like saying Bambi sucks balls because deer can’t really talk. Don’t give me a dirty look. This shit makes as much sense as Transformers and you went to see that twice.

Rating: 6 out of 10 - Gimmicks aside Journey to the Center of the Earth is a reasonably well thought out adventure that the family should be wowed by from start to finish. It’s definitely dumbed down a little from where they could have taken things, but the true spirit of adventure is there, and kids should eat that up.

The best use of the glasses has got to be the mine car sequence where they tear you through a rollercoaster-like trip. They put you right there and make it exciting enough where you only think once or twice about the fact that tribal warriors aren’t chasing you.

Pass. Most of the people that will buy Journey on DVD will do so for the same reasons they saw it in theaters – The 3-D effects. Assuming of course that the home version comes with a couple sets of glasses. Wouldn’t it be something if it only came with one set and the kids had to take turns watching it? I picture a scene where big brother lets little brother use the glasses during romance and plot development, but as soon as the T-rex shows up it’s conveniently “his turn� again.

The 3-D will sell this movie just as well on DVD as it did in theaters. You know what though? If you get stuck slumming it in 2-D there’s a slim chance you’ll have a good time too.

So I was looking out around the interwebs for something interesting on line for Journey (It only took 4 pages on Google images search before I found something both unrelated to the movie and completely inappropriate) and on the main page I found this neat little widget that calculates the other side of the world for you. Simply punch in your zip code and click to see details on where you’d end up if you dug your way through the Earth.

I thought, “This is a great idea!� until I actually entered in the information and found that the other side of the world for this New Yorker is pretty much nowhere. I don’t know what I expected. Maybe that I’d pop my head out of the soil to see the Great Wall of China or the Eiffel Tower and then me and my French doppelganger would go see The Dark Knight and split a croissant. Nope. I end up in the middle of the ocean with a wet piece of bread for one.

Anyway, try your luck. Hopefully the other end of the world yields better results for you.

So in today’s strip we see the return of “Kyle the movie snob� who appeared for the first time way back in the comic for Ultraviolet. He’s made a few appearances here and there since that first savage beating from Ultraviolet and Equilibrium director Kurt Wimmer, but I think this one might be my favorite because he’s getting beaten by a child. Even if you saw it coming, you knew he never stood a chance. Poor bastard.

The Gotham Ninjas Athletic T, in both men's and women's styles, continues to sell well even across the world where football is considered lame. So I appreciate that. Hopefully the coolness of a Batman association will help you in defending the shirt against Soccer purists.

I’ve been in a fog the past few days. We had some water damage that needed to be nipped in the bud and it was two solid days of our lives covered in plastic. I think our cat took it the worst. We’ve all since recovered though and are happy to not have giant watery stains looming above us.

Anyway, thanks for reading, gang. More soon.