Released: 02/10/06

Viewed: 12:15pm 02/11/06

Starring: Steve Martin, Kevin Kline, Beyonce Knowles, Jean Reno, Emily Mortimer

Directed by: Shawn Levy

Sony Pictures Official Site of the movie

As a child of the 80's and 90's I came along after the original Pink Panther films starring Peter Sellers had been made and become classic. So when someone says the Pink Panther to me, I think first of that cartoon cat in the commercials for the pink housing insulation. I would eventually come to discover the movies and the fact that the Pink Panther was actually a diamond being stolen and hunted down every couple of years by pretty much the most inept cop France could cough up.

I love the Peter Sellers version of Inspector Clouseau, but wasn't against a remake. It's a good character, and a good concept. To be honest there's not enough crime/mystery/comedies in theaters these days so the return of one that I was familiar with was a welcome gift. Besides after 2005, the year of the remake, I was officially ready for anything. If I can accept Jessica Simpson as Daisy Duke, then I can certainly accept Steve Martin as Jacques Clouseau

In fact, Martin being on the movie was huge incentive that the movie might actually be passable. He's done a few stinkers but I really believe he's one of the finer comedic minds of the last 30 years. He's got real instincts for what's funny and I respect that.

What I don't respect was the merciless advertising done for the movie. On SNL Martin admitted to pimping the hell out of this film, but that was just the cherry on the crap sundae. It's been non-stop for the past 2 months with everything from posters to TV commercials to Martin himself doing a 3 minutes sketch in theaters where, as Clouseau, he reminds people turn off their cell phones before the movie. I turned off more than my cell phone. I turned off all major interest in the movie.

I knew I'd see it, but I wasn't nearly as excited as I was when first hearing about the project. Then the movie got bumped from 2 prime spots in the summer of 05, and ended up in no mans land in February. The real reason for the bump is that the parent company of the distributor was bought out and stalled all projects in the works with legal issues, but? delays are never good. When the trailers were finally released and they chose to focus in on that damn bit about a Frenchman trying to pronounce "Hamburger", I was done. I'm sorry, that Hamburger thing is not that funny and every other day I'd be in the theater watching people choke on their popcorn laughing at it. What happened to annoying French people sucking? Does anyone else miss that?

So my love affair with this movie was over before seeing it. What started out as a great idea ended up looking like it was just going to be the same old thing. If we keep laughing at stuff that's not funny then they'll keep making it. But I was determined to go in without expecting it to suck. I do really try to take movies seriously and look at everything objectively, but to further warrant today's comic, I decided to count the moments where Martin's dignity was in question.

I stopped counting after 4 or 5 when I decided to drop it. The movie was turning out ok. It was about 20 minutes in and I found myself stretching to find these moments where he was undignified. I would analyze the scene and say to myself "Well it was a fart joke but it was actually pretty funny. Does that count? Should I bump it up to 6?"

Even more of a distraction from my mission of counting was that I was getting wrapped up in the story. It's not a great story, but I was starting to wonder who actually stole the damn diamond. And figuring that out is not as easy as it sounds. Don't try. You'll enjoy the pay off more.

There are a lot of strong jokes in the movie. Not jokes that really made me laugh out loud, but jokes that sort of made me recognize that they were funny. It's hard to explain. I wasn't falling out of my seat with the giggles, but I was respecting the humor that was happening. Most impressively is the way a lot of things make multiple appearances. The hamburger thing for example. It could very easily have been some lame 2-minute bit that had the audience rolling, and nothing more. But it ends up playing a major role later in the movie. That's pretty cool, even for a joke I wasn't too crazy about.

It's like a good stand up comic that will reference something said earlier in the act. That's hard to do but if it works it make s a huge impression. That's smart comedy.

I wish I could say that the acting and characters were perfect but I can't. Martin's accent was funny at times but it did start to get on my nerves. It's nice that he makes the character his own, but I miss some of the charm Seller's brought to the role. He's still pretty funny though. I'd love to see this work out for him. He needs a strong franchise.

Kevin Kline, Beyonce Knowles, and Jean Reno are all fine, but do little more than set up Martin's crazy antics. A sequel would be worth it just to let the supporting cast stretch their legs a little more. Though Reno did get to get dressed in that spandex outfit with Martin for the camouflage bit. Unfortunately there's no time to really laugh in that scene because you're too busy trying not to look at their balls.

I enjoyed the big reveal ending. I thought it was fun and inventive but part of me wishes they'd had a few more clues throughout the movie. I know it's better this way because it's much more random and it suites the way Clouseau's brain works. No one else could have figured this out because the whole situation is just way too stupid. So the pay off is good, but the set up isn't nearly as strong.

Going in not thinking it would be good, and having it no suck was kind of a shock. It's weird. I liked it enough to wish it were better. It didn't fit my low expectations, but it didn't shatter those expectations either. 5 out of 10 may seem a bit low after a review where I point out the good stuff, but the movie wasn't so bad that the bad stuff stands out. It's there, but it didn't terribly bother me. Sadly the good stuff didn't impress me enough to rate it above average. Maybe next time.

DVD worthy?: My first instinct was that it's not, but the more time I spend away from it the more affectionate I am for some of the finer moments. It's definitely not a must have, but if the price was right and it had free ticket to a sequel then sure. Why not?

If you liked this movie check out: Austin Powers

There's something about Panther that reminds me a lot of the Austin Powers franchise. Could be Beyonce. Could be that Beyonce was with men that were nowhere near her league. Could be the theme of mystery solving. Could be the goofy accents. Could be the irritable amount of promos and advertisements that littered national media for the last month. But The Pink Panther definitely has the same charm as the Austin Powers minus the vulgarity and really big laughs.

Panther goes family friendly and is able to keep kids attention but ends up sacrificing being able to push the jokes as far as they can go. Not that Austin Powers was that bad, but it was very PG-13. I'm not sure I can picture Steve Martin giving birth to a little version of himself via silhouette. And that little man certainly wouldn't give him the finger and kick his ass afterwards. Different movies, but still a close feel.

Trailer Hitch: R.V.

Watching the trailer for RV I wasn't thrilled. Seemed like real talent acting crazy for the sake of being crazy. I pegged it as another stinker in the Sonnenfeld library which has slowly been slipping in the credibility department over the last 10 years. But as the trailer went on I realized it's just a polished version of National Lampoon's Vacation. That movie has the same themes, the same wacky accidents and situations, and it was funny as hell! Of course it wasn't for kids.

RV could potentially be a huge family hit, but it won't stand the test of time because it's going to be tied down with kiddie humor. Humor can be kid safe and still funny, but RV will never be Vacation.

So, Yeo has that damn Beyonce song from the Pink Panther soundtrack stuck in her head, and she's been walking around all day singing and dancing to it. Only she doesn't know any of the words and her dancing consists of a lot of arm waving and booty shaking. Curious what that my look like? Vote and have a look. Non movie related stuff:

Wanted to give another shout out to Drastic Comics who have been awesome for spending their advertising coin with us. Head on over and have a look at the strip, and let them know how it makes you feel inside. Seriously, thanks guys. You rock.